New Beginnings

It's been a long time possums, but I feel the mood to blog. I guess a 7-mile run will do that to you. Yes, you read right. Seven. Freakin. Miles. Now, J-fa and I are training for a half-marathon. Nothing like a little self-punishment to get all the anger out, right? Why am I angry, you ask? Well, some people may be happy to discover their ex took three whole weeks to find someone new. Me, I got angry. And now, I'll channel that anger towards something productive. I imagine it'll be a great feeling of accomplishment when I finish that 13th mile in May.

On the work front, it's been mostly positive. A few interviews for fellowships have gone well, so I'm hopeful come June I'll have some certainty in my life. But in the meanwhile, I'm enjoying this sense of rootlessness. I guess a little sunshine brings some optimism.

Well, That Was Unproductive

A very unproductive two weeks. But it was vacation, after a very intense final semester of college, so I shouldn't feel too bad about slacking off, should I? So yes, I thoroughly enjoyed 2 weeks of laziness, TV watching (I now love the Golden Girls!), sleeping, and lots and lots of eating. And... I talked with J. A lot. I'll be going to NYC this weekend. Fingers crossed that absence and distance did make the hearts grow fonder. Now, off to find a job. And an apartment. (And lose the holiday blubber; as always, my resolution is to get that 6-pack back).
Ciao amores!

The End Is Nigh

Hello possums. We're approaching the end of college life, and though still largely murky, the future is starting to take some shape. I have one last final (it would be gov, of course) and then I'm off to New Mexico for the holidays. After some hasty near-decisions, I have (temporary) employment (yay?) at ILL for a few months. As of yet, still no housing other than couch-surfing (if I haven't come begging yet, keep an eye on your email). But, as I was quite upset that I might not be on this side of the country (and thus, be far, far away from J) for what could have been a long while, I'm very satisfied with this turn of events. I'm sure the pay will be crap, and the work is quite tedious, but I'll be near and among my dearest friends in the world, a 4 1/2-hour bus ride to NYC, and have the time I need to figure out where I truly want to be and what I truly want to do, and when I want to do it. I won't have all the stresses that come with being a Harvard student (of which, academics are only the beginning). So, I'm facing post-college life with a bright smile, as my HoCo Secret Holiday Bunny wrote: "Keep being friendly and fun, because there are too many grumpy people in this world." So I will be. Much love and Merry Christmas!

What is This Jubilee?

Exhilaration never felt so breathtaking. Undefined, unlabeled, unforeseen and still uncharted, but I will always choose adventure over complacency.

It's A Love Story

Well, maybe not "love" quite yet. I've had bad experiences when that emotion is expressed prematurely. But I spent an entire romantic hour with J after the Harvard-Yale. I've been with J before, at Yale 2 years ago, and so I expected to at least see him again. I didn't expect to kiss in a hammock under the starlit sky, cuddling with our rival Harvard-Yale sweatshirts. Will it go somewhere? Unclear. He's in New York and I'm here for another month, and then on God's good humor after. Is it worth chasing his lead? Definitely yes. He's the closest chance I think I've had to my perfect guy: my age, hot, smart, fun and funny, and so, so into me.

But let's not rush things.

Update:

J and I are going to Four: A Winter Formal. Squeal!

I'm Not Takin' No Calls 'Cuz I'll Be Dancing

Such a common refrain, but boys do suck. I know there's someone out there, and I just have to find him. It is harder for gay guys, and maybe it's just wishful thinking, but I think it'll be better/easier outside of Harvard.

Slutty Farmer

Once again, I find myself doing crucial homework at the last minute, after wasting so much time procrasturbating and not fulfilling commitments to my work and extracurriculars. I rationalize it with arguments like "Oh, I had such a tough last week, with 3 midterms and 2 papers." Obviously, not dropping the ball on those means, hey, willpower, let's take a vacation this week. But I didn't even do my best on those big assignments because I'd been dropping the ball all semester, academically, extracurricularly, and employmentally.

How does it get better? It has to, if I'm going to have anything resembling a successful life. But I don't know where or how to go from here: to go from a serial procrastinator/flake to someone on top of his shit. And I'm not delving more deeply into this dilemma. Instead, I'm orienting my life around the next party (Halloween), planning my costume (slutty farmer), and obsessing over (another) straight crush.

Help?

Slippage

Widener has turned out less well this week, but as always HoCo provides a bright spot. We've begun planning, and it seems that even though school is still 3 weeks away, the spark from last semester might still be there!

Living in Medford has been a blast, so much that even though I hate Boston winters (and probably will even more if I have to pay for heating oil), staying here after graduation is a top preference (maybe above New York, but not Spain). Of course, post-graduation plans require one thing, a job. And with this economy, who knows where that will show up.

And slippage, well, that refers to my confidence, which is slipping away after an unfruitful weekend in Provincetown (yes, I am that gay).

Let's Try Not To Jinx This

I had a wonderful drunken time last night with Sade for her birthday weekend celebration kick-off. We pre-gamed in her room, then finally made it to Gypsy Bar, which was cool, though I don't know if the music was exactly what Sade wanted. I met two of her good friends from high school who were hilarious and so much fun! (As a side note, I really do enjoy meeting new people, especially when I'm drunk.) We got back to Harvard around 2am, decided we wanted food from Eliot Grille because they have bacon, clogged our arteries a little more with mozzarella sticks, and then headed back to Lev. And then the fun started, but I'm not ready to reveal anything just yet...